清晰的溝通週期 Part O

 清晰的溝通週期


溝通、理解和思想 溝通涉及思想

從一個人到另一個人的轉移。成功的地方，就有理解。因此，與另一人的關係就該特定通信而言得到滿足。沒有自己理解這樣的事情;它只而且總是發生在關係中。

一個想法主要不是由內容驅動的，例如“我喜歡藍色”或“這是美好的一天”，而是由它的動力驅動的，即決定與另一個人建立聯繫。一種思想與另一種思想的區別在於具體內容。

如果我們本質上不是社會動物，我們就不會有這樣的思想。我們是由我們的關係定義的，思想是以特定方式與另一個人交流的決定。“特定方式”是思想的內容。一個想法的產生只是因為它固有的交流慾望。如果這失敗了，這個想法就不會消失，因為它是一種以特定方式交流的願望。思想是有實際存在的。因此，未溝通或部分交流的想法會作為實際的干擾在頭腦中積累，因為我們永遠不會停止嘗試被理解，即使我們認為我們已經放棄了希望。這是頭腦喋喋不休。放棄被理解的希望“的想法本身就是試圖傳達沒有傳達的東西，但現在這種嘗試被扭曲成對生活和他人的態度。


純粹的溝通

大多數我們認為的交流都涉及某種使用身體的口語。但在最純粹的形式中，交流不是通過身體的媒介發生的。在這種情況下，思想甚至不會顯現出來，也不會通過任何媒介（包括語言）傳遞。這並不意味著它是心靈感應，因為心靈感應首先涉及思想的形成，但在沒有身體的情況下移動。純粹的溝通很少發生，但偶爾會在沒有思想的情況下進行溝通。深愛的人有時會經歷這一點。

在最簡單的情況下，一個想法完全由以特定方式與另一個人聯繫的決定組成。如果人與人之間的溝通渠道是開放的，那麼對方就會收到某物，而沒有轉移。在這種情況下，溝通是純粹的，完全實現的。為了做到這一點，溝通者不得抗拒對方或試圖強迫他們希望與之交流的人。在這種情況下，思想就會產生，其中固有的溝通行為將轉化為溝通開放的管道。如果對方同樣開放，他們只會立即收到通信。雙方的意識狀態會發生變化，雙方都知道已經收到了通信。

在這種情況下，思想和行動是相同的，因此思想不會以與行動分開的形式表現出來，一旦行動成功完成，思想就會消散。純粹的思想沒有後果;（帕坦伽利）的條件，沒有業力累積。

但是，接收方可能無法接受通信，因此可以選擇不接收通信;無論是有意識的還是無意識的，個人總是有這種選擇。但是，如果他們確實選擇聯繫，他們只是根據該思想或交流的特定特徵以這種特定的方式意識到溝通者。

這種純粹的溝通並不是一個思想的移動，因為這個思想從未顯現過。要轉移，必須有東西要傳達;這隻發生在時間和



空間中。轉移必須具有A點和B點，在A點和B點之間轉移明顯的思想。如果這個想法從未顯現出來，那麼這個人只是在這個特定方面意識到另一個人。

純粹的溝通是溝通光譜的一端。這不太可能在客戶身上實現，但如果是這樣，在這些情況下，頭腦清理的工作就完成了。清除主要發生在通過某種語言傳遞的顯性思想領域。


中介溝通

當我們把想法附加到世界並命名事物時，我們就會發展語言。語言在我們和我們的經歷之間建立了緩衝，並改變了我們與世界的關係。1 語言是心靈的體現。我們習慣於通過語言和身體將我們的思想作為顯性的想法進行交流，以至於我們談論它們，就好像它們是在時間和空間中傳遞的微妙事物一樣。事實上，他們是;它們是顯明的思想。這種想法與另一個人的交流是通過某種語言實現的，因此永遠不會100%完成。

在最壞的情況下，交流的願望出現了，但從未嘗試過傳達思想，因此它可能作為一種未實現的溝通而暫停在溝通者的腦海中。只有當投資將其傳達給另一個人時，它才會懸浮在腦海中。但通常一個想法會隨著修改的成功而轉移。一個交流的思想將消失到它成功轉移的確切程度。如果一個人與另一個人交流而溝通被拒絕，那麼這將是一個問題，只要這個人有思想或可以看穿它。換句話說，如果沒有投資來傳達溝通，他們要麼會意識到不值得嘗試，因為這個人對接收它持封閉態度，要麼他們會負責以另一種方式或另一個時間傳達它，或者他們會簡單地認識到發生了什麼，而不是為此感到困擾。



在一段關係中，對被對方理解有衝動和依戀，那麼失敗的溝通，無論多麼清晰，都會因為這種依戀而產生更多的思想。



誰負責溝通？為了進行成功的溝通，進行溝通的人必須負責讓自己溝通。在幫助的情況下尤其如此。發起者希望將某些東西傳達給另一個人，所以特定的溝通週期完全是他們的責任。客戶正在接受培訓，以負責溝通，以便進行實際理解。Clearer充當發起者，以實現新的學習。這是雙方都在進行的對話，因此，儘管清除者對會議期間完成的溝通周期負責，但他們必須完全參與。結果是有真正的合作。

接收者的工作不是。無論你多麼想把東西傳達給另一個人，你都不能把某人變成一個接收者並強迫他們得到它。這是他們一個人的選擇。事實上，您希望接收您的通信的人可能不願意接收它。對於我們中的一些人來說，很難理解的是，這真的不是他們的問題;是你想溝通的。

無論責怪你想與之交流的人沒有收到你是多麼誘人，當人們明白溝通者有責任在任何情況下傳達資訊時，生活會好得多。The Clearer在那裡幫助客戶學習如何做得更好，從而停止與他人發生問題。

這並不意味著我們有義務留在困難和不被接收的關係中。但是，我們可以更加意識到正在發生的事情，如果這是我們必須採取的步驟，以便更普遍地在我們的生活中更加充實。

2 儘管不可否認的是，溝通需要至少有一個人可以溝通，但贊助者
仍然有責任將溝通傳達給另一個人

。事實上，沒有人會最終拒絕溝通，但他們很可能會強烈抵制很長時間。他們最終不會反抗，因為我們來這裡的目的就是彼此接觸和溝通，所以這就是他們真正想要的：

這個宇宙中沒有一個個體最終會拒絕溝通。這包括你的父母、孩子、丈夫、妻子或你的宿敵。他們可以暫停它。他們讓你拿走你的信，把它撕毀並燒掉，但他們仍然會想，我想知道裡面有什麼。他們仍然想知道。所以他們可能會拖延它，研究你，看看它是否沒問題。但他們的生活目標是意識到你向他們發送的是什麼。這就是他們想要的，否則他們就不會在生活中。這就是生命的本質。這是對生命的定義。如果一個人沒有聯繫的目標，那麼這個人就不在生活中。所以根據定義，我們把它們困住了。您可能需要將其放在盤子上。您可能需要打扮它並撫平它並潤滑它。你可能不得不將它與其他一千件事聯繫起來。你可能不得不把它淡化，稀釋一部分到十億，但儘管如此，在他們開放的程度上，他們會接受並且不會拒絕。他們都是，他們中的每一個，都在全力以赴，以接收他們所能收到的每一個可能的通信。
3
此外，如果我們把人當作實際上試圖與每一盎司交流的人。他們的力量，無論他們是否看起來這樣做，那麼與他們合作或實際上與他們一起生活會容易得多。事實上，一個人作為 Clearer 的任務是“將這種意識和能力 [客戶從根本上想要溝通並且可以這樣做]，衷心而完整地帶入您的會議中”。四 沒有這一點，事情將更加困難。



THE CLEARING COMMUNICATION CYCLE


Communication, understanding and thoughts

Communication involves the transfer of a thought from one person to another. Where this is successful, there is understanding. The relationship with the other person is thus fulfilled with respect to that particular communication. There is no such thing as understanding by oneself; it only and always takes place in relationship.

A thought is not primarily driven by content, such as ‘I like that colour blue’ or ‘It’s a nice day,’ but by its impetus, which is that it is a decision to relate to another person. What differentiates one thought from another is the specific content.

We would not have thoughts the way we do if we were not fundamentally social creatures. We are defined by our relationships and a thought is a decision to communicate in a particular way to another person. The ‘particular way’ is the content of a thought. A thought only comes into being because of the desire to communicate inherent in it. If this fails, the thought does not go away because it is a desire to communicate in a particular way. Thoughts have actual existence. So uncommunicated or partially communicated thoughts will accumulate in the mind as actual interference because we never stop trying to get understood, even when we think we have given up hope. This is mind chatter. The idea of ‘giving up hope’ of being understood is itself an attempt to communicate what was not communicated, but that attempt is now distorted into an attitude about life and others.


Pure communication

Most of what we think of as communication involves some kind of spoken language that uses the body. But in its purest form, communication does not happen via the medium of the body. In this case, a thought does not even become manifest and is not transferred through any medium, including language. That does not mean it is telepathy, for telepathy involves the formation of the thought in the first place but transferred without a body. Pure communication rarely happens, but occasionally a communication is made without a thought taking form. People who are deeply in love sometimes experience this.

At its most simple, a thought consists entirely of the decision to relate to another individual in a particular way. If the channels of communication are open between persons, then that something is received by the other person without there being a transfer. In this case the communication is pure and completely fulfilled. In order for this to happen, the communicator must not be resisting the other person or trying to force the person with whom they wish to communicate. In this case the thought will arise and the action of communication inherent in it will translate into a channel of communication opening up. If the other person is equally open, they will simply receive the communication instantly. There will be a change of state of consciousness in the parties such that both know the communication has been received.

Thought and action are identical in this situation, so the thought does not manifest in separate form from the action and dissipates as soon as the action is successfully completed. There are no consequences to pure thought; in Patanjali’s terms, there is no karma accruing to it.

The receiver, however, may not be open to the communication and so may choose not to receive it; there is always this choice open to individuals whether conscious or unconscious. But if they do choose to relate, they are simply aware of the communicator in this particular way according to the particular character of that thought or communication.

This pure communication is not strictly a transfer of a thought because the thought never became manifest. To be transferred there has to be something to be conveyed; this only happens in time and



space. A transfer must have points A and B between which the manifest thought is transferred. If the thought never becomes manifest, then the person simply becomes conscious of the other person in this particular respect.

Pure communication is at one end of the spectrum of communication. It is unlikely to be achieved with clients, but if it were, the work of Mind Clearing would be complete in those cases. Clearing mostly takes place in the realm of manifest thought transferred through language of some kind.


Mediated communication

When we attach ideas to the world and name things, we develop language. Language puts a buffer between us and our experiences and changes our relationship with the world.1 Language is a manifestation of mind. We are so used to communicating our thoughts as manifest ideas via language and the body that we talk about them as though they were subtle things to be passed on in time and space. In fact they are; they are manifest thoughts. The communication of such thoughts to another person is achieved through language of some kind and so is never 100 per cent complete.

At worst, the wish to communicate arose but there was never an attempt to communicate the thought, so it can become suspended in the mind of the communicator as an unfulfilled communication. It remains suspended in the mind only if there is an investment in getting it across to the other person. But often a thought is transferred with modified success. A communicated thought will disappear to the precise extent to which it was successfully transferred. If a person communicates to another and the communication is refused, then this will be a problem to the extent that the person has a mind or can see through it. In other words, if there is no investment in getting the communication across, they will either realise it is not worth trying, since the person is closed to receiving it, or they will take responsibility for getting it across in another way or at another time, or they will simply recognise what has happened and not be troubled by it.



In a relationship where there is charge and attachment to being understood by the other person, then the failed communication, however clear, will create more mind because of that attachment.



Who is responsible for the communication? For successful communication to take place, the person doing the communicating must take responsibility for getting themselves across. This is especially the case in a helping situation. It is the initiator’s wish to get something across to the other person, so that particular communication cycle is entirely their responsibility. The client is being trained to take responsibility for communicating such that actual understanding takes place. The Clearer acts as the initiator in order to enable new learning. It is a dialogue both parties are engaged in so, although the Clearer is taking responsibility for the communication cycles being completed in session, they have to be completely engaged. The result is that there is a true collaboration.

It is not the job of the receiver to receive. However much you want to get something across to another person, you cannot make someone into a receiver and force them to get it. That is their choice alone. Indeed, the person whom you want to receive your communication may be unwilling to receive it. The difficult thing for some of us to appreciate is that this is really not their problem; it is you who wants to communicate.

However tempting it is to blame the people you want to communicate to for not receiving you, life will go much better when it is understood that it is the communicator’s responsibility to get the message across in all circumstances. The Clearer is there to help the client learn how to do this better and, consequently, stop having problems with other people.

This does not mean we are obliged to stay in relationships that are difficult and where we are not received. But we can be more conscious about what is happening and leave if that is the step we have to take in order to be more fulfilled in relating in our lives more generally.2

Even though it is undeniable that communication requires there to be at least one other person to communicate to, it remains the initiator’s


responsibility to get the communication across to the other person. In fact, no one will ultimately refuse a communication, but they may well resist strongly and for a long time. They will not finally resist because what we are here for is to be in contact and communication with each other, so that is what they really want:

there is no individual in this universe that will ever ultimately refuse a communication. That includes your parents, children, husband, wife or your arch enemy. They may suspend it. They make take your letter and tear it up and burn it, but they will still think, I wonder what was in there. They still want to know. So they may delay it, studying you over to see if it’s all right. But their goal in life is to be conscious of what it is that you are sending them. That’s what they want or they would not be in life. That’s the essence of life. It’s a definition of life. If an individual does not have the goal to relate, then that individual is not in life. So by definition, we’ve got them trapped. You may have to serve it on a platter. You may have to dress it up and smooth it out and grease it. You may have to relate it to a thousand other things. You may have to water it down, dilute it by one part to a billion, but nevertheless, to the degree that they are open, they will receive and will not refuse. They are all, every last one of them, pitching with everything they have got to receive every possible communication that they can receive.3

Moreover, if we treat people as beings who are in fact trying to communicate with every ounce of their strength, whether they appear to be doing so or not, then it will be much easier to work with them or, indeed, live with them. In fact, a person’s task as a Clearer is ‘to bring this awareness and ability [that the client fundamentally wants to communicate and can do so], heartily and completely, into your sessions’.4 Without that, the going will be much harder.